well most of my day revolves around power hour
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Randomize
