just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize