she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
