We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
