belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
