Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
