If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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