My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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