this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I believe in your delicious
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
