Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
We just shotgunned beers for America
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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