im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
