don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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