nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
