Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
My dick has a subreddit
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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