oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
