my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
