STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
