She's JV to your varsity
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
