We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
