I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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