Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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