Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
