so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
