Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?

(1-404): View more from Georgia

did you answer or finish?

(404): View more from Georgia

both

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(913): View more from Kansas

he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.

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(480): View more from Arizona

he seriously made his penis a facebook.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?

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(574): View more from Indiana

I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor

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(218): View more from Minnesota

He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.

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(817): View more from Texas

The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....

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(315): View more from New York

All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night

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