sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
The power of my boobs compel you
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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