69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
