I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i think i have two assholes
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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