i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm both gender and math confused
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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