Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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