Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
