Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
