that's an acceptable place to lick
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
