It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
