You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
We don't watch enough power rangers
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
