once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
