you guys were way drunker than both of me
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
