Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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