Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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