Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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