dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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