R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
The beer is more important than you right now.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
