So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
