Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Randomize
