I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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