So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
You left your phone here
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