i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Randomize
