What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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