I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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