I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize