Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
